Marijuanalogues IV

Smoked up after almost a month (Four rounds of Frosties that too). So here's my list of "What not to do while smoking", and keep in mind I was slightly high when I typed this out.

1. DO NOT DROP THE BLUNT/JAY. I know guys who punch noobs kick them out the rotation for this its one of the worst things to do.

2. DON'T DROP THE BONG/BOWL. Just as bad as the first one but if you do this you could end up owing money to somebody. Hold it tight when your high.

3. KEEP YOUR VOICE LOW. I know I hate it when everyone is chilling then the one dumbfuck is blabbing his fucking lips off talking about nothing in particular. If no one else is talking keep your stupid shit to yourself.

4. NEVER EVER SHOUT OUT OR SAY "COP/PARENTS/TEACHER" ANYTHING LIKE THAT UNLESS YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY SURE. I've hooked a friend in the face for doing that.

5. DON'T BABYSIT THE BLUNT ITS CALLED PUFF PUFF PASS FOR A REASON. I can understand if its your weed and its just you and a friend then take your time, but if its not yours and there's more than 3 people get some good hits in then pass it.

6. DON'T WET THE BLUNT/JAY. If your lips are wet wipe them on your shirt or the back of your hand. I hate when I get my blunt back and it has spit all over it.

7. DON'T SQUEEZE THE BLUNT/JAY BECAUSE THE MORE ITS DEFORMED THE HARDER IT IS TO SMOKE. Hold it tight enough not to drop but gentle enough for it to stay a cylinder.

8. DON'T TRY TO TELL PEOPLE WHAT TO DO WITH THEIR WEED. I hate when the young bull of the group is telling me that I need to roll up another blunt because we aren't high enough. STFU Junior.

9. DON'T ACT HIGHER THAN YOU ARE. People will see right through your act so don't even do it.

10. JUST RELAX AFTER A SESSION. PEOPLE LIKE TO KICK BACK AFTER A BLUNT, SO DON'T BE THE GUY WHO ENDS UP MAKING A FOOL OF HIM SELF.

11. IF YOU START COUGHING PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GET THE BLUNT/JAY/PIPE/BOWL TO A SAFE PLACE. I've seen 2 bowls and 1 bong get shattered by cough attacks. It's not pretty.

12. DON'T ALWAYS MOOCH. TRY TO BRING SOMETHING TO THE CIRCLE IF YOU CAN. If you develop a reputation of being a mooch people won't like you, bring some bud sometimes or drinks or snacks. Don't just rely on other people all the time.

13. DON'T BREAK HOUSE RULES. I hate when people come over and I tell them what not to do then 20 minutes after the session they are doing it. Just follow fucking rules and every thing will be cool.

14. IF YOU'RE NEW, DON'T GET FREAKED OUT WHEN YOU'RE HIGH. TRY TO CHILL AND ENJOY IT QUIETLY. It sucks whens everybody's watching a movie and you're in the middle talking to yourself. Just fucking CHILL.

15. IF SOMEONE ASKED YOU TO ROLL AND YOU CAN'T, THEN DON'T TRY. ASK SOMEONE WHO CAN. Nobody likes badly rolled jays/blunts. Let someone else do it if you can't. Remember practice makes perfect go home and master a jay when your by yourself so you can surprise people next time.

16. DON'T LET PEOPLE KNOW YOUR A ROOKIE IF THEY DON'T ASK. Keep it yourself. What they don't know won't hurt. Some people will look at you in a different way if they think your a newb. Just chill and handle your self well and you will be getting respect in no time.

17. TRY TO MUFFLE YOUR COUGH. Nobody I know likes to hear people cough their lungs out.

18. NEVER EVER EVER EVER BLOW INTO THE BONG OR COUGH INTO IT.

19. IT NEVER HURTS TO SAY THANK YOU. If someone smokes you out say thanks, I always appreciate it and it makes me want to invite you more cause your respectable.

20. DON'T LOSE THINGS. Lighters/matches/papers/blunts/bowls, make sure you have them if someone asked you to hold on to them.

21. DON'T REPEATEDLY TALK ABOUT HOW HIGH YOU ARE. Don't saying things like "Oh my God! Everything is spinning!!". It just gets annoying

22. DON'T EAT MY MUNCHIES WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. I'm not against sharing, but my house isn't a fucking buffet either.


To all you smokers, help me add stuff to this list.